Whether you've been asked to be the groom's best man or one of the ushers, being chosen as a groomsman (or honor attendant for women) in the wedding party is a privilege and comes with many responsibilities. Or, maybe you need to figure out which men (or women) are the best choices for your groomsmen (or honor attendants). Whether choosing or being chosen, there are many factors to consider.
When getting married, a friend chose a good high-school buddy as his best man. At the wedding ceremony, the best man disappeared and was later found wandering outside in the parking lot when he was needed at the altar. The friend realized the best man was drunk and wanted to kick himself for not thinking harder about his choice.
If you agree to accept the honor of best man, groomsman, or honor attendant, do take it seriously. If you are having trouble deciding on whom to ask as your best man, ushers, or attendants, don't make your choices out of guilt or obligation but think hard about who will adequately fill the shoes.
Traditionally, only men were chosen as the groomsmen and best man. Nowadays, regardless of gender, grooms are choosing the person best suited for the role. Women are quickly settling in as honor attendants, just as men are being sought after as bridesmaids'. Although the honor would remain the same, some of the responsibilities, when filled by the non-traditional gender, may be adjusted. For example, if the honor attendants for groom and bride alike were both female, the expectation of dancing together during the reception would be eliminated.
Outfit your honor attendants with the appropriate attire. Decide on coordinating gowns and garments that will offset your bridesmaids' dresses, while coinciding with your overall color scheme and wedding theme. Don't feel as if your honor attendants' outfits need to exactly match your bridesmaids. Likewise, your groomsmen's tuxedos should be smartly styled, but don't have to be identical. Many wedding colors are chosen around the season or time of year. For example, shades of orange and brown can be used during fall weddings, and so on. Remember, photos will be taken, most likely with natural scenery as a backdrop, and your bridal party colors will make or break the final image.
A groom was recently getting married and at a loss for an usher gift. Short of both cash and ideas, he discovered a brand new, sterling silver pin, in a perfect box, tucked away in his drawer. He remembered that this was given to him several years prior when he was a groomsman. Having no intention of ever wearing the pin, he simply wrapped the gift in appropriate paper and presented it to the groomsman during the rehearsal dinner. For all we know, the pin may have passed or will pass many more generations of groomsmen before it is actually kept and appreciated. More groomsmen and groomsmen gift information can be found online at Groomsmen.com.